Lonely in Ministry

There is an assumption out there that ministry is for the extroverts. That church ministry is a lively, social profession that has you constantly around people. There might be some truth to this, but more often I have had severe moments of loneliness when in ministry. This feeling is not isolated to me, but is actually very common in ministry. What leads to it? Why do we end up with this feeling? While, I might not be able to answer these questions for the majority, I can shed some light on my experiences and what has lead me to feel lonely.

This last week I had a bout of loneliness. I was setting up for Vacation Bible Camp. After spending 20+ hours decorating and creating a few little backgrounds, I looked around and it felt daunting. See, over the course of those two days there was only one family to help out with the set up. There were two staff members (+ one spouse), and my relatives. After all the advertising, begging, pleading, and crying out for help the only response is from those who are paid to be around or family (almost paid!). There was no support of the ministry that was taking place.

This, I believe, is one of the biggest causes of the loneliness in ministry. Spending hours working on something only to have no one show up, or help make an event possible. This attitude that comes out, in all the churches and settings I have been in, leads to the question of "Am I making a difference?" Or maybe more to the point, "Am I laboring in vain?"

The point that has seemed to have been missed in the church today is that it is not the minister's and paid staffs ministry, but those in the church. Which leaves us with two conclusions, either we are doing the wrong things in church (hence no buy in), or the wrong message is out there. The wrong message would be the idea that you have to be in "leadership" to do anything in the church.

The other perception that could lead to this is the individualistic approach to ministry. This idea that everyone needs to have their cup filled at church so they can go throughout the week leads us to not try to help others, but focus on ourselves.

I have no answers for this, just another plea for help. On behalf of all the youth leaders, pastors, ministers, and other program leaders, please help. It is not our ministry alone. We are only one piece of the body. We need the other hands, feet, heart, eyes, and ears to make us a complete church. Without you, we just have a job and no purpose. We desire so badly to support, guide, help, but we also need care too. Otherwise we burnout fast.

Now, back up to church to set up the rest of Vacation Bible Camp...alone...