There is an assumption out there that ministry is for the extroverts. That church ministry is a lively, social profession that has you constantly around people. There might be some truth to this, but more often I have had severe moments of loneliness when in ministry. This feeling is not isolated to me, but is actually very common in ministry. What leads to it? Why do we end up with this feeling? While, I might not be able to answer these questions for the majority, I can shed some light on my experiences and what has lead me to feel lonely.
This last week I had a bout of loneliness. I was setting up for Vacation Bible Camp. After spending 20+ hours decorating and creating a few little backgrounds, I looked around and it felt daunting. See, over the course of those two days there was only one family to help out with the set up. There were two staff members (+ one spouse), and my relatives. After all the advertising, begging, pleading, and crying out for help the only response is from those who are paid to be around or family (almost paid!). There was no support of the ministry that was taking place.
This, I believe, is one of the biggest causes of the loneliness in ministry. Spending hours working on something only to have no one show up, or help make an event possible. This attitude that comes out, in all the churches and settings I have been in, leads to the question of "Am I making a difference?" Or maybe more to the point, "Am I laboring in vain?"
The point that has seemed to have been missed in the church today is that it is not the minister's and paid staffs ministry, but those in the church. Which leaves us with two conclusions, either we are doing the wrong things in church (hence no buy in), or the wrong message is out there. The wrong message would be the idea that you have to be in "leadership" to do anything in the church.
The other perception that could lead to this is the individualistic approach to ministry. This idea that everyone needs to have their cup filled at church so they can go throughout the week leads us to not try to help others, but focus on ourselves.
I have no answers for this, just another plea for help. On behalf of all the youth leaders, pastors, ministers, and other program leaders, please help. It is not our ministry alone. We are only one piece of the body. We need the other hands, feet, heart, eyes, and ears to make us a complete church. Without you, we just have a job and no purpose. We desire so badly to support, guide, help, but we also need care too. Otherwise we burnout fast.
Now, back up to church to set up the rest of Vacation Bible Camp...alone...
Showing posts with label support. Show all posts
Showing posts with label support. Show all posts
Saturday, July 17, 2010
Friday, April 23, 2010
Support of Dreams
There have been many things that have come up in the last month that I have meant to write about. I have had times were these topics have rolled through my mind and I thought of how to put it up here. Alas I did not. Other things grabbed my attention and pulled me away before I could remember to write about it.
This time its different. Most likely, knowing myself, because I am a little upset about this. Here it is:
There have been many times in my life where I have come up with big ideas, dreams, or visions. These things seem great to me and I can clearly see the purpose of them. One idea was a local mission trip to show students how we can serve locally and not just in other places. I wanted to gather support from local youth leaders and contacted them and worked hard to get things going. In the end all I heard was no, too busy, or hey why don't we do this instead. No one listened, and instead tried to get me to support their thing.
Later when working I presented an idea of how to save myself and the ministry lots of time. The summer slowed down and I would have some slow time to finally get to some larger projects. I thought and decided to ask my supervisor if I could go to the Catholic Library at the Archdiocese and use that quiet space to focus and use the resources, to plan the curriculum for the middle school that year. She ended up saying no, most likely because she did not trust me.
Now I have the dream to become published and write a curriculum that will help our students, and hopefully others, this summer. My Pastor is very supportive, but I don't think I'll get to do it.
Am I bad at articulating? Is there some vision or plan that I am missing that others can see?
For me I have come to a conclusion. No one, professionally, is going to support my dreams. I am going to have to do it myself. I know going this route is going to cause me to become burned out fast, but what am I to do? I have a desire, an itch, a passion that I have to pursue. If it is not something I can do during work time then I am going to have to sacrifice personal time to do work.
I pray that God has a plan for this, because I know this is going to take my already low tank and pull the one plug keeping things in. I hope that God has something in store for the other side of this to help me grow and see others grow.
Nothing like a sports analogy to finish things.
I have already been running the race a while. I am tired and thirsty. I know I have one sprint left in me and I am going to use it now. It might spell the end and failure, but I know I have to do it. This is my shot and I have to trust there is recovery coming. Breathe deep...and go...
This time its different. Most likely, knowing myself, because I am a little upset about this. Here it is:
There have been many times in my life where I have come up with big ideas, dreams, or visions. These things seem great to me and I can clearly see the purpose of them. One idea was a local mission trip to show students how we can serve locally and not just in other places. I wanted to gather support from local youth leaders and contacted them and worked hard to get things going. In the end all I heard was no, too busy, or hey why don't we do this instead. No one listened, and instead tried to get me to support their thing.
Later when working I presented an idea of how to save myself and the ministry lots of time. The summer slowed down and I would have some slow time to finally get to some larger projects. I thought and decided to ask my supervisor if I could go to the Catholic Library at the Archdiocese and use that quiet space to focus and use the resources, to plan the curriculum for the middle school that year. She ended up saying no, most likely because she did not trust me.
Now I have the dream to become published and write a curriculum that will help our students, and hopefully others, this summer. My Pastor is very supportive, but I don't think I'll get to do it.
Am I bad at articulating? Is there some vision or plan that I am missing that others can see?
For me I have come to a conclusion. No one, professionally, is going to support my dreams. I am going to have to do it myself. I know going this route is going to cause me to become burned out fast, but what am I to do? I have a desire, an itch, a passion that I have to pursue. If it is not something I can do during work time then I am going to have to sacrifice personal time to do work.
I pray that God has a plan for this, because I know this is going to take my already low tank and pull the one plug keeping things in. I hope that God has something in store for the other side of this to help me grow and see others grow.
Nothing like a sports analogy to finish things.
I have already been running the race a while. I am tired and thirsty. I know I have one sprint left in me and I am going to use it now. It might spell the end and failure, but I know I have to do it. This is my shot and I have to trust there is recovery coming. Breathe deep...and go...
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Sheep feed your shepherds!
This last week I went to the Pacific Northwest Annual Conference for the United Methodist church. It was a great time with lots of fun, faith, and rock band. I loved getting to meet with more pastors and chatting about church with them. Far and away the high point for me was getting to see my good friend (and mentor) get ordained.
The whole ceremony was a wonderful celebration. It was one of the few times I got to sit down and actually pay attention to a sermon. A bishop named, Roddy White, spoke and did a wonderful job. His message centered on Jesus talking with Peter about feeding his sheep (John 21: 15-19).
"Yes, Lord," he said, "you know that I love you."
Jesus said, "Feed my lambs."
This passage makes a lot of sense in an ordination as a bishop is reminding those who are entering the pastorate that they must feed the sheep that Jesus has entrusted to them. They are now becoming a shepherd to take care of all those at their churches and in the communities around.
What struck me was that the bishop shifted and told a story of visiting a woman, Mrs. Quinn. In his first church he found out Mrs. Quinn expected him to visit each week. He was nervous going over there the first day. As his time with her ended he prayed for her. He was ready to leave, but Mrs. Quinn stopped him and prayed for him. He told us how amazed and lifted up he was by this prayer. He made sure to visit her every week because she fed him. She fed the shepherd.
We often forget taking care of our shepherds. We have pastors, mentors, ministers, leaders, and teachers that all give so much to all of us. The pour out into our cups and we soak in their wisdom, guidance, and care as much as we can. In the end though who pours back into the servants cups?
Bishop White spent double the time talking to the "sheep" about feeding their "shepherds". It was fascinating to see this stress to the laity to take care of these shepherds. All I could think was "amen" to this line of thought.
As I have worked in youth ministry for three years now I resonate completely with this sentiment. While I worked at Mary, Queen of Peace there were very few there helping to feed me. My shepherds there did not reach out to support or encourage faith. My personal faith was not something of concern. If I knew the right prayers, did all the motions then I must be ok. The stress was program not ministry.
The families there were wonderful, and tried. The stress in the Catholic church is much more on how the leaders are to teach and lead the laity. The laity ends up not seeing themselves as ministers. We are all ministers! We are all theologians!
When I worked with Dj, he constantly taught and told his kids how they were theologians and ministers. He broke down that boundary for the students and had them pursue and grow in leadership. They intern were able to take up the mantel and grow. The families there continue to encourage and feed me even though I was only there for two summer internships.
This is the response we all need to have for our shepherds. I am racking my brain now to think of the other ways I can support my shepherd. She has supported me and ministered to me. I want to make sure I do what I can to represent God to her and help her grow. If that means making it possible for her to leave on a vacation and know that everything is taken care of then that is what needs to happen. If it means taking one of the responsibilities off of her list then we all need to step up and do that for our ministers.
There is an analogy I have heard used many times. It is that ministers come to God to get their cup filled. Then they must pour out their cup into others. Simply put this is how we burn out pastors. It implies that when ever I am low they need to step up and feed me. It takes all the responsibility off of the "sheep".
Instead we should all pull close to God, the living water, so that all of our cups can overflow into one an other's. This allows us to all become full, and for the living water with us to flow back into our pastor's cup.
Feed your Parents!
Feed your Mentors!
Feed your Teachers!
Feed your Shepherd!
The whole ceremony was a wonderful celebration. It was one of the few times I got to sit down and actually pay attention to a sermon. A bishop named, Roddy White, spoke and did a wonderful job. His message centered on Jesus talking with Peter about feeding his sheep (John 21: 15-19).
Jesus Reinstates Peter
15When they had finished eating, Jesus said to Simon Peter, "Simon son of John, do you truly love me more than these?""Yes, Lord," he said, "you know that I love you."
Jesus said, "Feed my lambs."
16Again Jesus said, "Simon son of John, do you truly love me?"
He answered, "Yes, Lord, you know that I love you."
Jesus said, "Take care of my sheep."
17 The third time he said to him, "Simon son of John, do you love me?"
Peter was hurt because Jesus asked him the third time, "Do you love me?" He said, "Lord, you know all things; you know that I love you."
Jesus said, "Feed my sheep. 18 I tell you the truth, when you were younger you dressed yourself and went where you wanted; but when you are old you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will dress you and lead you where you do not want to go." 19Jesus said this to indicate the kind of death by which Peter would glorify God. Then he said to him, "Follow me!"
This passage makes a lot of sense in an ordination as a bishop is reminding those who are entering the pastorate that they must feed the sheep that Jesus has entrusted to them. They are now becoming a shepherd to take care of all those at their churches and in the communities around.
What struck me was that the bishop shifted and told a story of visiting a woman, Mrs. Quinn. In his first church he found out Mrs. Quinn expected him to visit each week. He was nervous going over there the first day. As his time with her ended he prayed for her. He was ready to leave, but Mrs. Quinn stopped him and prayed for him. He told us how amazed and lifted up he was by this prayer. He made sure to visit her every week because she fed him. She fed the shepherd.
We often forget taking care of our shepherds. We have pastors, mentors, ministers, leaders, and teachers that all give so much to all of us. The pour out into our cups and we soak in their wisdom, guidance, and care as much as we can. In the end though who pours back into the servants cups?
Bishop White spent double the time talking to the "sheep" about feeding their "shepherds". It was fascinating to see this stress to the laity to take care of these shepherds. All I could think was "amen" to this line of thought.
As I have worked in youth ministry for three years now I resonate completely with this sentiment. While I worked at Mary, Queen of Peace there were very few there helping to feed me. My shepherds there did not reach out to support or encourage faith. My personal faith was not something of concern. If I knew the right prayers, did all the motions then I must be ok. The stress was program not ministry.
The families there were wonderful, and tried. The stress in the Catholic church is much more on how the leaders are to teach and lead the laity. The laity ends up not seeing themselves as ministers. We are all ministers! We are all theologians!
When I worked with Dj, he constantly taught and told his kids how they were theologians and ministers. He broke down that boundary for the students and had them pursue and grow in leadership. They intern were able to take up the mantel and grow. The families there continue to encourage and feed me even though I was only there for two summer internships.
This is the response we all need to have for our shepherds. I am racking my brain now to think of the other ways I can support my shepherd. She has supported me and ministered to me. I want to make sure I do what I can to represent God to her and help her grow. If that means making it possible for her to leave on a vacation and know that everything is taken care of then that is what needs to happen. If it means taking one of the responsibilities off of her list then we all need to step up and do that for our ministers.
There is an analogy I have heard used many times. It is that ministers come to God to get their cup filled. Then they must pour out their cup into others. Simply put this is how we burn out pastors. It implies that when ever I am low they need to step up and feed me. It takes all the responsibility off of the "sheep".
Instead we should all pull close to God, the living water, so that all of our cups can overflow into one an other's. This allows us to all become full, and for the living water with us to flow back into our pastor's cup.
Feed your Parents!
Feed your Mentors!
Feed your Teachers!
Feed your Shepherd!
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