Holy Spirit

Lately, I have been reading a book by Frances Chan called "Forgotten God." This book revolves around the Holy Spirit and how we often forget about this crucial part of our Triune God. While I have been touched about how often I do forget about the Spirit, last night two things stuck out to me while reading.

The first is this perception in Christianity that if I am not lead where I do not want to go then I am not really doing God's work. I found this often while on campus at Azusa Pacific. There was this feeling as though we were all being judged of if we gave up everything and went some place to serve. Not just this but it had to be a place we did not want to go.

This became a dominant Christian narrative on campus, just like having a single moment where you became a follower of Jesus, or you went on coffee dates. The feel began to be this have and have-nots of followers. I realize most of this is just perceived, but it became very frustrating.

I found myself torn as I wanted to do that also. I wanted to go abroad and give up time in my life just to serve and nothing else. The problem is that is not who God created me to be. Now I imagine people responding back, "How do you know that?" It has been confirmed to me again and again. I contract just about every illness I come into contact with. Every trip to a poverty stricken area I end up coming down with a serious illness. I had a 102 temperature from another mission to Mexico, where I also contracted Tuberculosis. And on another Mexico mission I ended up puking for days. Once, is just a chance, multiple times and I believe something is trying to be communicated.

In the end the perspective that we all MUST go aboard to serve God is just false. Some are called to go, and others to stay. The important part is serving with all your heart.

The second thing that we often forget that the Spirit is right there to walk with every day. Jesus told us the spirit would be better than having Him around. Personally, I do not act like that. I yearn to have Jesus with me. I forget about the gift that we have been given.

The saddest thing for me is to realize how little I include God, or more specifically in this life. I have tested God's promise of being given the Spirit when we ask. I have felt fully that I was no longer in control of myself and the Spirit had taken over. The things that came from that were beautiful and more fruitful that I could ever accomplish. So why do I now forget?

It is time for me to wake up and remember the Spirit. Allow the Spirit into me and to take over. I miss teachable moments. I say the wrong things, stumble on testimony, become tempted by things and sin, and fail to honor God with the things I do and fail to do. When I have included the Spirit in my life none of this has happened. I know that I often get in the way and I want to no longer do that. I want to let go and let the Holy Spirit take over.

By doing this I know that true Joy, true Beauty, and true Faith shall come. Enter Spirit, I am ready to be convicted, redeemed, and counseled.

Father Abraham

There are so many stories that we have that revolve around Abram (or later known as Abraham) I will try and write my thoughts on as many of these as I can over the next few days as I have a few days "off".  The first story that I came to after Job was the story of Abraham moving to Canaan. 

Abraham goes with his father to a new area. In this place he marries Sarai. We also meet the nephew Lot in this new land of Haran. Then Abrams father dies. It is then that Abram moves to a new land at God's direction. Interestingly enough the land that they were actually going to at this time was not Haran but Canaan. The settled in Haran. The text does not say why. We could speculate that the trip was too difficult for Abram's father Terah. We could also guess that maybe it was because they ran out of money or thought the land there was well worth it. Almost reminds me of the many apartments that when you are driving you see have a sign out reading "If you lived here you would be home by now." Maybe they just wanted to be home by now. 

After his father dies he continues to Canaan. This lends a lot to the theory that it was his father's decision to settle there. Once that barrier is gone then the journey can continue. On the way God shows Abram where he will be given land. Unfortunately they can not stop there because there is too much famine. Again Abram must wait. He heads to Egypt to live a while. It is here that Abram pretends Sarai is his sister and gets the Pharaoh in trouble with God. 

The thing that I notice here is the theme of waiting. Just like Moses the land was not freely given. There was a journey to get there. In that journey we may see the goal and be taken elsewhere along the way. That is usually when we get the most frustrated. We know where it is to end. We can taste it. Instead we are taken on a long journey elsewhere in the mean time. 

On my own journey I have seen this. I have seen what it is I am to do, become, or live out for God. Although many times I have to wait. There are two examples in my life that stick out at me right now. The first is college. I knew what college I was to go to. God made that very clear for me. When I got there I had some fun, but I did not grow the way I thought I would. After 2 years I considered transferring because this was not the promise that I had when I started. I had seen my glimpse and now I was journeying to "Egypt". In my third year I finally started to realize the purpose of my being there. I started to grow in the ways that I had always felt I would at APU. In the 4th year I was rewarded with great friends and life changing classes. 

The other example I have is being in youth ministry. My first actual job in youth ministry was an amazing one. I was supported at Faith UMC and grew so much as their intern. I was challenged and knew this is what I was supposed to do. I then went on to several other jobs at a baptist church, Faith UMC again, and Mary Queen of Peace. These places where my "Egypt" or wandering through the desert. I needed to grow more, struggle, and stop trying to do things myself. Now I am at a church where I feel I have put those things together and God is rewarding me. 

The journey of Lent is almost over. We all might have had our plans changed over this time. We all might have gone to Egypt. Stay faithful and God will bring you back to where he showed you at the beginning.